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Type of bind: Paperback
Dewey Decimal Number: 306.81
EAN num: 9780060509316
ISBN number: 0060509317
Label: Harper Paperbacks
Manufacturer: Harper Paperbacks
Quantity: 1
Page Count: 272
Printing Date: March 01, 2005
Publishing house: Harper Paperbacks
Release Date: March 01, 2005
Sale Popularity Level: 423364
Studio: Harper Paperbacks
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Product Description:
Why is it so difficult to remain married in the twenty-first century, and what can you do about it?
We all know that half of today's marriages end in divorce, but we tend to believe that our own marriages are safe. As psychiatrist John Jacobs explains in this fresh and impassioned book, marriages yesterday are incredibly fragile, and unless a couple understands what is making contemporary marriage so vulnerable to dissolution, the marriage is at risk.
Part of the problem is that people refuse to see how social and historical forces have changed the very meaning of marriage, causing serious interpersonal unhappiness. Because of increased longevity, married people live together longer than at any time in history. There's been an erosion of the social and cultural forces that traditionally kept marriages together. Confusion over gender-role responsibilities, increased expectations of sexual satisfaction, and intense time pressures on couples to work and be successful all create marital stress.
And yet, most people don't acknowledge the problems in their marriage until it is too late. We tend to believe in the 'lies of marriage' -- such concepts as soul mates, unconditional love, that children improve a relationship, that the sexual revolution has made marital sex more pleasurable, or that egalitarian marriage offers couples easy solutions -- and forget to engage in the constant hardwork required to keep our marriages alive.
Dr. Jacobs believes that most marriages have significant problems at some time, but until we recognize the new realities of marriage and develop the skills required to sustain a loving, intimate relationship, marriages are at risk.
Of course marriage is about love. But that's just the beginning.
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Rated by buyers 
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"We live in a society that promotes so many powerful lies about marriage, so many misunderstandings, myths, and fairy tales that have become so deeply entrenched in our minds, that we are rarely able to approach marriage with reasonable expectations." ~ John W. Jacobs
John W. Jacobs takes a very realistic view of marriage. As a couples therapist he provides advice for the contemporary marriage. He even goes so far as to declare that "marriage itself is under attack."
This book uncovers some of the real reasons behind marital unhappiness and gives strategies to deal with major and minor problems. It may be shocking at very first to hear the truth but John W. Jacobs claims your marriage will only survive if you make it a top priority.
A third of "All You Need Is Love" is dedicated to improved communication skills like receptive listening. One chapter is dedicated to explaining why children may make a marriage unstable. As you read this book you may also come to understand why your own childhood is now affecting your marriage in a big way. The importance of sexual intimacy is briefly discussed, as are solutions to common complaints.
Some of the most interesting and helpful points include information on how our culture has become such a big influence on our lives. With marital stress at an all-time high it is truly a challenge to stay married. By realizing that problems are inevitable you can take on the challenge of fighting for your marriage.
~The Rebecca Review
Rated by buyers -
Straight forward advice, easily applicable steps to improve or SAVE your relationship from doom... though it isn't a pill, its a lot of hard work. I recommend the book and a good therapist to walk you through it.
Rated by buyers 
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My boyfriend and I recently started talking about marriage, and when he recommended I pick up this book - I did not like the title - I thought it was a very pessimistic view of marriage. I started reading the book, and realized that it was not pessimistic, but rather very objective and reinforced many of my own views on marriage. I have not finished reading it - I got sidetracked with a course I'm taking - but I think it's a great book for anyone in a serious relationship contemplating marriage. I even recommended it to a friend of mine.
Rated by buyers -
The title of the book was a little strong and really made my wife mad when she saw me reading it. It should be call 'All You Need Is Love and Other DELUSIONS About Marriage' and more people would get past the cover. As you read it you find yourself saying "That kinda sounds like (fill in the blank)" As you read it, it is best to look at your self in the mirror. After all, you are the only one who you can really change. This book would be a great book as a gift for a child or friend contemplating marriage.
Rated by buyers -
Clear, concise and enormously useful book. Worth reading if you are in any type of serious relationship or plan to be someday. Dr. Jacobs puts in different light common and destructive misconceptions that, in spite of their romanticism, serve to undermine romance and relationships. I found it somewhat wanting in the chapter on sexuality but superb in a number of others, enough to go on a "must read" list. Buy it or give it to someone you know or love.
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